I watched
the movie Dangerous Minds again last
night. It hurts me to say it but I feel
Michelle Pfeiffer never quite lived up to her full potential. To be clear: I think she is an insanely,
dementedly good actress but her roles/movies often do not meet this standard. My hope is that she may have something of a
late career renaissance. That is all I hope
for in this miserable fucked up world.
I don’t know
which brand I should select for a new electric bass guitar. I’ve limited the field down to roughly
9-dozen choices including Fender (Precision), Lakland and Gibson! Maybe I’ll just fork over my pitiable life
savings for a deposit on a Carl Thompson bass.
That would make me the happiest man alive for about 5 minutes and then I
would be back at square one with only my own rotten self as company. It cannot be underestimated how much I truly
despise myself. I am a bloated and ugly thing.
I have failed in every possible way imaginable. I will buy dozens more bass over the course
of my miserable lifetime. I desire a
Precision bass, a Thunderbird, a Stingray, that bass Peter Hook uses and
another Jazz bass. I also want a double
bass – an acoustic one and an electric one – despite knowing my playing would
be even worse on such an instrument.
Hamer too! And a fucking
Rickenbacker! And whatever Ibanez
makes! Why the hell not?!
I typically
stay from dancing shows but Baila Si
Puedes premiered this past week and I was compelled to watch with my eyes
as wide as saucers and my heart as cold as a winter’s night. The reason for this sudden about-face is the
fact that one of the participants slash contestants is Consejo Mundial de Lucha
Libre luchadora Estrellita. Those who
know me best know I’ve been deeply in love with Estrellita since an early age
and that this love eventually boiled over into a deeply unhealthy obsession. I await her every new match with bated breath
and now the same goes for her every new dance.
She makes my heart pound at a dangerously accelerated rate. I need her.
In my wildest
fantasies I dance with Estrellita. However she soon grows tired of my well
below average skills and promptly takes me to floor and puts me in various
wrestling submission moves while verbally berating me in Spanish and heavily
accented English.
I just heard
the announcement on my 2 way wristband radio that John Wick 2 has officially been green-lit. This news makes me squeal with girlish
glee. Savvy readers will recall the
original John Wick was one of my
favorite flicks of 2014. It narrowly
missed my top ten list though I soon regretted this decision. If I could go back in time and change
anything in my life I would go back and put John
Wick on my top 10 movies list of 2014.
A flood of
big pop culture related news and stuff has been exploding across the interwebs
during these past few weeks. I’ve been
so excited I’ve hardly had time to feed the baby ducks nesting outside my
window. I like to wake with them and
greet the dawn by venturing naked outside and allowing the rich glow of the
morning sun to caress my ample body. I
have not yet seen Avengers: Age of Ultron. Maybe one day. Though I could not possibly be more excited
for Mad Max: Fury Road which arrives
at the multiplex in little more than one humble week!
I passed out
last night after watching the movie Batman
Forever for the first time in decades.
When I awoke at roughly 2 AM Pacific Standard Time I found that Chiquis
– daughter of the late Jenni Rivera – had released a new single and video from
her upcoming album NEEDTOCHECKTITLE coming out next month. I’ve lost interest in this train of thought
while writing it. In summation: she
super hot, muy rica, don’t know about the voice.
Those in the
know know that I’ve never been the physically largest and metaphorically
biggest fan of the character Harley Quinn as I find she has a tendency to
dilute the raw potency of the Joker.
However I gradually find myself growing more and more excited at the
prospect of this upcoming Suicide Squad movie wherein Margot Robbie is
playing the best gal of the clown prince of crime. I approve of the recently released official
pic of the group and of the spy pics I’ve seen on various underground cinema
sites. The pebble in my shoe – the fly
in my ointment – regarding this flick is the presence of one Will Smith as I’ve
sadly never cared for the man as an actor yet visually I so far have no problem
with his interpretation of Deadshot. This
is another subject in which I’ve suddenly lost interest while in the midst of
writing. I wish I had a big bowl of
Lucky Charms cereal right now. I love
sugary cereals. I’ve been listening to
Jane’s Addiction a lot lately. Bassist
Eric Avery is a huge influence on my sound.
Sometimes I play the bassline to the brilliant song Three Days for 9
hours straight just because I love it so much.
I’ve also been listening to an insane amount of Kate Bush. Eat the Music is my jam. Thank you Kate, for everything.
There are
serious doubts as to whether I am a real person. I feel like she hates me. There is no longer any meaning behind
anything I do. I began to wonder about
heaven and hell and which one I was head for.
Is it okay to call upon you for help?
Everyone in that particular circle tells me this is not allowed. But I want to.
Tonight, I’m
going to head to the local cinema and watch Russell Crowe’s directorial debut The Water Diviner. Then maybe I’ll go home and swallow a bottle
of sleeping pills or finally blow my fucking brains out. I’ll probably fantasize about a fictional
character (or several) at some point in the evening.
Time has
passed since I started writing this and I have now seen The Water Diviner. I’ll only
say that Andrew Lesnie’s work as cinematographer was stellar and I would be
happy to see Crowe direct again. I’ll
also say that Olga Kurylenko puts a spell on me every time I see her. I am truly, madly, deeply in love with her. I have read she auditioned for the part of
Wonder Woman in the upcoming film Batman
v Superman: Dawn of Fishsticks and I am deeply gutted she did not get the
role. Just the mere thought of her as
Wonder Woman makes me explode in ecstasy.
I want to
stand with Olga and Estrellita on a mountain.
