crud (and CIWI19 p. 1)

The mule I consider to be good Eastwood lark.  Maybe slightly more than lark.  Maybe a good bit more than lark.  It feels like a very sweet little coda to a great career.  I do wish he’d do a few more takes sometimes but I understand that’s his style.  There were some pretty and curvy ladies in some scenes too which I loved.  I’m a bad person and I really hate myself.  Once upon a time in mexico is a movie I’ve seen multiple times, one of my all time favorites and has a very specific and special significance to me which I won’t go into here.  it is a deeply important film for me.  I’m sure I’ll watch dozens more times.  It has a really great soundtrack too.  Buy the album!  And cook Puerco pibil!  I made it recently and it turned out good but I don’t really care that much cause I’m not a foodie.  However this trend on these particular entries will not last. 

Cruising I watched while drinking some really awful sangria thing and then I think I watched the gus van sant psycho remake later on when I was drunk.  Cruising I loved though and recently acquired the special edition blu ray.  It really feels like an ominous grim thing now and something which could never be made today.  Love the germs soundtrack too.  Do I qualify?                             

Psycho (remake).  Well looks like I was right.  I grappled with this one for years but now I see it as a bold experiment very much ahead of it’s time.  American Psycho I’ve watched multiple times as I think it is quite hilarious.  I think it is a great book, a true classic, but only a good movie.  The Ritual was a solid horror movie with some effective creepy moments and a monster I dug.  I would recommend it to any horror fans.  The House That Jack Built (theatrical cut) did it’s job well and pretty much what I expected from Von Trier.  Matt gave a GREAT performance and he was scarier than Bale’s Bateman if I have to compare the two.  There is also one very creepy and grotesque image in a fridge that remains etched in my brain.  I really liked this one. 

Death Proof is a movie I just adore and I’ve watched it many a time.  it always makes me hungry for nachos.  I’m a big Kurt fan.  I think this is an underrated gem and I would like a 457 hour cut!  Sideways was a great movie and one I shall return to.  The Last Wave was an odd one.  there was some haunting apocalyptic imagery.  And then I thought of a later period episode of millennium.  I always enjoy things bathing in paranoia.  In Between was a great film.  Honest Stories about women are very appealing.  I need to rewatch this again soon.  They’re not much alike but I have this kind of linked up with Princesas (which makes me cry) in my stupid mind. 

Nico, 1988 is exactly the type of biopic I like.  Great artist too.  I, Tonya of course I’d seen before.  I love it as an examination of the slipperiness of the truth, some good comedy too. 

Blown Away is just 90’s action crap, really bad, the U2 stuff was funny.  Mowgli I enjoyed.  It was an enjoyable version of this tale.  Don’t imagine why I would ever revisit it.  Feel kinda bad for Serkis that his passion project was beaten by the Disney thing.  Children of Men is a great looking movie.  Hisss I actually loved and wish she’d been given the chance to showcase her true vision.  Breaking Up was an enjoyable riff on a familiar thing but I’m partial to these types of movies and the actors.  Don’t think it’s really a hidden gem but it was a good watch.  Glass was by far the best of the trilogy. 

I would rank HBO’s miniseries The Outsider as among the very best of Stephen King adaptations.  Man, La Infernal looked lovely in that recent interview with the Caribbean.  A deadly obsession is taking hold.  My right forearm is growing tight and numb.  I recently started reading a gritty sweaty western novel and I liked the first fifty pages so much I immediately ordered another book by the same author!  That’s bold of me!  I’m getting into George Michael’s music these days.  I’m also finding that avante garde jazz is the only music which can match my current headspace.  Or is it?  The more I learn the less I want to know.  Soon, I’m going to buy a lot of 90’s comic books online.  I think my focus will be more horror gothic stuff or something: Hellblazer, The Demon, Ghost Rider, The Question and Vengeance of Vampirella.  These will be my focuses.  I need to look at lots.  Questions are always scarier than answers.  I think.  Need to read about aardvarks too.  And swamps.  I want to get the separate issues of From Hell.  Man, I love From Hell.  Sand.  Too long without sand. Milica keeps utterly annihilating my best resolve.  

I’m listening to the new Pearl Jam album.  Earlier I was listening to the new Nine Inch Nail albums.  These really took me back.  Yet there is still vitality here.  I’m outlining a new project.  Sometime this miserable fucking month.  I purchased several pairs of pantyhose recently.  I need a sponsor.  Oh encasement. Reverse.  I was watching the newest Sion Sono movie last night.  Apropos of nothing (or is it?) I need to join a suicide club.  Outer Dark did build to an eerie apocalyptic finale.  But I must say I think it’s a bit hypocritical of ol McCarthy to criticize some of the others for…something… magical realism or something.  I don’t know what I’m talking about anymore. 

Oh there was just a glance, a sacred second, a wave.  It was everything.  Camel.  Need to last as long as possible.  Remember descending, powdered blue.  I may again know the jackal who is not the jackal.  Tropical hot dog night had me this week.  And zorn.  Only certain things match my headspace anymore.  I am such a loser.  These days I’ve mostly been subsisting on Candy Bloom videos.  No, that’s not quite the right word.  Because it is joyous.  I’m so very thankful for her.  The other who obliterates my resolve. I am deeply madly truly in love.  I’ll see you at 18 o clock later on.  Oh please let it be so! 

stairs

What chance do I possibly have when Milica is wearing these things?  but thank you so much.  than you so so so much.  please after a long hard day of interviewing (hopefully in rooms with no proper air conditioning) please use my face to rest your feet.  PLEASE!  this morning I was listening to Megan Thee Stallion, really grooving to her album that came out last year.  I was also listening to her this afternoon.  I watched the Netflix movie Horse Girl again last night and noticed things I didn’t pick up on before cause I’m stupid.  I’m going to cry when Glow ends.  And if I have any guts at all I’ll also throw myself into the river (which reminds me of another river), I woke up on some red sheets and was crying while drinking last night.  I need to resume reading Pogo.  I love Blackhat.  I know I’m in the minority.  I hope one day I can see the director’s cut but I’m very happy with the theatrical cut and I often fall asleep clinging it to my bosom.  I love Mann’s visions.  Been watching the Miami Vice tv series.  And I thought of Manhunter.  And other great Mann things.  you know, I really love the Lovecraft story  The Colour Out of Space.  Not sure what I think of the recent adaptation.  And that JG Ballard book about the crystal forest.  I need to reread that one while guzzling bottom of the shelf wine.  You know, it’s not quite as good as Danny Elfman’s scores but I am definitely a fan of Elliot Goldenthal’s score for Batman Forever.  Why did I have to qualify it like that?  Why mention Elfman at all?  Because I’m a horse’s ass, that’s why.  The soundtrack is pretty great too!  Only one soundtrack is forever….  A large part of any of my seedy corrupt days involves thinking about pantyhose.  I have good memories from last summer of listening to Lila Downs albums.  I imagine I’ll listen to them again this upcoming summer.  I have a few ideas of what book I may read next.  I think one will arrive in the mail tomorrow.  I wasted most of my day but it at least it was all in service to greed!  You know I really did like that show Ghost Whisperer.  It was a very sweet heart warming program.  The first four years were pretty much perfect.  I’m looking forward to the new albums from Lady Gaga, Haim, Body Count and Pearl Jam.  Do I like ratchet music?  I need to sit in a lemon yellow chair. 

i thought i had the inland empire soundtrack but i was wrong casue i'm a big ugly lsoer.  and it is so expenisve.  maybe i can find a digital copy! my passion is equal to the task.  i need to spill ketchup on myselft.  i need to have visions. what killed me the other day?  i remember the exact match.  i'm late on everythign.  stuff closing in.  heat's gettin' to me.  i just need a day.  one good day. i need someone to tell me if they know me.  cut off fingers last night, spiders the night before.  "JUST SHUT UP!" She screamed at me!  i really really hate myself.  my mommies didn't lvoe me.  love those 3 Parliament albums.  love p funk.  love the wu tang clan.  i really like doja cat's album! holding back tears last nightw hile listening ot bat for lashes.  i was sitting in my car in a parking lot yesterday reading a Barry Gifford book.  I love reading in parking lots.  i recently ordered 2 other Gifford books from two different online sellers.  if only.  Need to keep reading Pogo.  I finished a book about a half hour ago.  I enjoyed the book.  It was Reina Isis tonight.  Line down the back.  What the hell is wrong with me? but that was it.  I can’t blame anyone or anything.  Tiffany and then Reina Isis.  Last Saturday night broke my heart but I was indebted and so could not say anything.  Man, Fun House by the Stooges is just one of my favorite albums ever.  Does it make me want to melt my face off?  hard to say.  It kind of feels like it though.  I need to get megan thee stallion’s new ep.  I think tomorrow.  Big dream this morning.  Zorn the other, some red bats.  Speaking of bats I love the new batmobile.  Don’t stab me in the back with an ear of corn. 

Rituals had me again.  Think back.  Favorite earlier today. Powered blue on black and descending, towering over, so beautiful and powerful.  Later on, red and green and little black on top.  The black was domino style, and very forcible green.  “I didn’t feel like wearing pants today” everything so wonderfully calculated.  I’m reading a good book these days.  Just reached seven seven seven.  Of course there was stark white and transparent white in the early evening while procuring something to counteract the effects of alcohol.  Is that everything?  Fisherwoman prior.  It’s all been building up and then down my throat again.  Crosseyes at one point.  Silly face.  Nothing quite makes sense.  Where is the regret? Perhaps incapable as I so deeply mired in sin.  Heart loves sin.  Wild and something involving a longmower are the missing pieces, not as interesintg but just as fascinating and oddly crucial.  I can see the similarities.  Sundown later on and heart if I can remember.  Yes, favorite descending and exerting total control.  Need to kick.  In order to do this I need to buy little slips of paper and a stapler.  This can work.  I believe I can make this work.  but do I want it?  Precious little left anymore.  Good thing the machines are safely tucked away.  The eyes crossing cast evil irresistible spells.  Made to worship…after a long hard day…oh please.  The accounts are going to dwindle in no time if the beast is reawakened.  Love millennium.  I ate garbage earlier.  I am obsessed with… 

The Just My Size by Hanes Day Sheer Ultra Soft Touch feels the absolute best wrapped around my face so far.  I need to try the kind that has the control top though.  Please help me. the next logical step again.  All washed per policy.