So like everyone in this miserable world I woke up this
morning to discover the rather exciting news that Idris Elba and Matthew
McConaughey have been cast as protagonist Roland Deschain and antagonist Walter
O’Dim AKA Randal Flagg AKA the man in black in director Nikolaj Arcel’s
upcoming initial installment of an ostensibly epic adaptation of Stephen King’s
mighty fantasy opus The Dark Tower!
I grew up on the works of ol’ Steve King and The Dark Tower series are some of my very favorite books of all time. As a fan I am very excited they are finally seeing a cinematic adaptation and I am tempted to put my life on hold and sever several largely unnecessary friendships right now that I may have a fresh surge of free time and promptly re-read the entire series. Yet as a fan I also have a few misgivings and this wouldn’t be the internet if I didn’t feel like my useless opinion was worthy of occupying some of its space. Let me break it down a bit.
Casting: I have no issues whatsoever with this principal casting. I can safely say I never pictured Idris Elba as Roland while reading the novels (this is likely due to King always describing his as a Clint Eastwood type though I always pictured more of an Ed Harris anyway) but Elba is a great actor who continues to prove himself and I know he has the depth of range for the part and would make a great anchor for a franchise. He also obviously has the physicality and presence for the gunslinger and I look forward to his interpretation of the character. I am even more pleased for the McConaughey factor and I can honestly say I cannot imagine anyone better for this role. So casting, great! I’ve no qualms so far. Except the news that actress Abbey Lee is in talks to join the case as Tirana and to both those names I say who the hell is that?! Turns out Lee was in Mad Max Fury Road (great film) and was quite good in it so that was predictable ignorance talking. However the character is a bit of a strange inclusion so early on. This is a writing issue which leads me to…
Writing! By far the most troubling news about this project is The Dark Tower is allegedly shooting on a script written by Akiva Goldsman. Goldsman name should make anyone go into convulsion and bite of their own tongue off in raw mortal terror. He of such all encompassing shit as Batman Forever, Batman and Robin, Lost in Space, I am Legend, The Da Vinci Code, The Insurgent series and a few other similarly awful feature films. The fact that it is his pen adapting these books should give any sane person or any person who likes well-told stories at least some pause. Additionally, it has been reported they will be picking up somewhere in the middle of the story. I’m not sure if that means the middle of the first book or (more likely) the middle of the series in general. The added news that much of the story takes place in our world suggests the latter is true which would probably mean it takes place somewhere in book 2 or 3. The previously mentioned Tirana is a character who only appears in the last book which suggests they will be condensing/changing things in some pretty big ways. All of that is understandable. Dark Tower has not proven itself to be commercially viable in a cinematic sense so while as a fan I would love for 7 movies to be made of the 7 books I can accept the producers need to hedge their bets and come out as strong as possible. The first book would adapt quite easily into a movie but would it draw people back for part 2 (which is VERY different). I can happily accept change as long the essence of the tale remains true and the characters are recognizable as their literary counterparts through their dialogue and actions.
Director! The only Arcel movie I’ve seen is a Royal Affair which starred Mads Mikkelsen (swoon) though that was a very well done film which showed Arcel is a very capable director and as of now I’ve no doubt in his abilities. Given the source material I often thought Guillermo Del Toro would be a good choice for a Dark Tower adaptation but I’m very curious to see what kind of touch Arcel is going to bring to things.
Release date January 13, 2017/shooting schedule: Aside from the horrific specter of death presence of Goldsman, this is the other major sticking point. January is a notoriously awful month for movies and historically a dumping ground for shit films in which the studio has little to no faith. There are always exceptions – and I’ve certainly enjoyed many a January release because I love many terrible movies – yet this release date does not instill one with a great sense of confidence. Again, I can only write this off as this material being unproven at this point and the studio not wanting to gamble a potential franchise on a riskier release date. But that still leaves a rather short turnaround time – less than a year – to complete the film and have it released. Rushed productions are also rarely a sign of great things to come.
Despite my complaining I am truly excited this project is finally seeing fruition and I want to hope for the best. The presence of two great and in demand actors like Elba and McConaughey suggests there’s something good in the script or in Arcel’s plan. I think I will pour myself a bowl of Life cereal and make a conscious decision to remain cautiously optimistic, excited and eager to see what vision of these great books comes to fruition. There is a rich mythology here and enough story for several great films. I hope several great films are created!
Gosh I love these books! Please don't screw up the adaptation! I beg you!!!
Me off to eat
doughnuts! I’m a legal eagle!
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