I’d
forgotten how effortlessly sexy Kate Del Castillo is. How I would love for her to torture and
murder me and give me incredibly tender little kisses right before I
expire. How I would love to kiss her
feet. I would give slavish devotion to
her feet. I would love for her to look
at me with disdain with those sexy eyebows, to let me know how beneath her I
am, how pathetic she finds me. I enjoyed
her new Netflix movie too. Or did
i?! the more I learn the less I want to
know. Hope she keeps coming out with new
product. She’s at a very sexy point on
her life and it just drives me fucking wild.
I just fucking lose it. I really
do. I just took a tremendous squelchy
eye-watering crap! Don’t know if want to
end the end with shrimp or chicken wings.
Your old pal Jimmy Adjudication, writing from the gutters and sewers of
this fair city. White trash cackles
outside my window. This town is full of
bloated sweaty white trash. Disgusting
people, all. I’ve been a responsible
young lad and paid my rent, had a wet shave and now I’m getting ready to go see
The Symbol of Purity. Or am i? the more
I learn the less I want to know. Been
relatively flatlined recently, wonder if this will wake me up. Ate some delicious shrimp last night. Need to make some plans soon. passeggiata!
Mama Roma! Need to move to
tangier, drink a lot and write reports. I
just took a tremendous crap! Very
satisfying. Recently I was in the
presence of The Symbol of Purity. It was
even lovelier than the first time. twas
grazed by the well manicured. Cybernetic
confirmation of the symbolism. Kept
drinking because the offers kept coming and did not want to leave the
presence. Recognition. But everything basic so far. Need to learn the rhythms. Glorious weight . so powerful. Fantasized again about being
electrocuted. Fantasized again about
being mocked and strangled. Fantasized
again about being fantasized by a giant glorious ass. There is a nice breeze coming through my
window. I recently read a largely
plotless novel and really enjoyed the plotlessness of it all. Those who know me best know that I love
reading in parking lots. I would one day
love to be at a grocery or department store where a clerk handles all the
bagging and to be purchasing roughly twenty items and for the bagging clerk to
give each item it’s own individual bag.
Oh yes, she was glorious, wondrous.
How I crave emasculation and humiliation. Oatmeal paste. Oatmeal.
Need to order a book of photographs.
Looking at a sad and lovely woman dancing with a half burnt out fag
between her lips. Looked like a punk
scene. Chest hurting from too much
coffee and booze. Feel some relief. Gonna include a passage from my longhand
diary here: 5.5: The Symbol of Purity has me again . leaving me
breathless. So lovely and gorgeous those lovely strong and rough hands. Her sweet little voice. Her big beautiful derriere. Is she a new muse? Who do I have left? My only hope is to see BLANK at the ball one
night.” See, my God I am a terrible
writer. using the word lovely too
much. But it’s all so lifeless. Just want the hell am I trying to say? Still, writing longhand gets you connected to
the source and the language in a different way.
What am I trying to say? I guess
I’m trying to say I want to mercilessly cause my demise while somehow
simultaneously comforting me in the final moments. Cruelly mocking and being so tender at the
same time. is that it? are the chimpanzees culturally
indoctrinated? Should have bought a bag
of chips when I went to the store earlier.
Holy sin . I was remembering something beautiful and tragic earlier
today while driving around. No, tragic
is not the right word. It was
awful. I am awful. Awful.
There seemed to be recognition. I’m
hunched over now while I peck away. Hooded
sweater again? Very polite. I only ordered another drink because she
asked if I wanted another one. then the
sun hit me hard. I’ve been neglecting
dessert options. Still gotta hone down
the formula. Unfortunately Jimmy’s
needs may get in the way of all this. But
perhaps that is for the best. I’m so
clear minded right now. or am i? the more I learn the less I want to
know. How to best impart that all I want
in life is for her to be crushing and trumpeting all over my face with her big
can after a suitable amount of time has passed following her enjoyment of a
good meal, laughing and berating me all the while, perhaps also holding my
hands and wrists with her beautifully manicured hands. Firmly or gently? Little of both? At some point perhaps kiss her feet in
hosiery. At some point she uses a shrink
ray and dips me in a big mound of homemade guacamole and consumes me. would love to watch her step in and sit in a
massive mound of homemade guacamole. I’m looking at a melted screwdriver right
now. I’m also squinting. Will those lotus drinks give me the same
heartburn that coffee and booze does? Sucking
down pepto right now. hosiery all over
the place indicates an out of control mindset.
Novels are a wonderful thing. Not
sure how much I can deadlift but I can promise you it isn’t much. Missing all
of them tonight. Where is the Dark
Angel?! Mayhaps tomorrow. I really like that one album of what she
described as a bunch of gross songs. It has
good stylings all over it. I strongly
associate it with a certain time in my life and with certain characters in my
life. a time that has not yet fully
reached it’s conclusion. That and one
that is very beautiful. Two sides of
the. Counting down the days now til I may
return. Motherfucker, I count the
days.
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