Friday, May 16, 2025

one comma zero two six

 

A squid in the hand!  Johnny Impotency here, belching up a lot of Mexican beer and well tequila as I peck out this latest chapter of my failed and useless life!  my dinner left me unsatisfied as food always does.  Or does it? the more I learn the less I want to know.  But only the food itself.  I recently drank a tall glass of tepid tap water (my favorite).  It really hit the spot.  Of course the fans want to know my reaction to 2 things.  the first is my reaction to the last Superman trailer.  I liked it . it made me happy.  I am looking forward to watching that movie.  or am i?!  the more I learn the less I want to know.  The second is of course that casting announcement that I literally and figuratively slept on, that of Moore and Domingo.  How could I not have known.  And what does those in the inner circle make of this?!  Of course, they are both too pretty for their real life counterparts.  But then again that could easily be fixed in any number of Hollywood magic ways.  But even if it isn’t who cares?  This is just an interpretation.  I’m just excited that the story will be told and brought to light again . I’m disgusted with myself that I missed the announcement.   We must never be apart.  Was recently watching a woman empty the contents of several jars of peanut butter and jelly and then smush around the contents with her feet and I nearly fucking lost it.  it was so deliriously wonderful.  Then another video of her doing with a pile of cooked macaroni and cheese.  Just drove me fucking wild.  Just ruined my inner life.  but never forget that I am Johnny Impotency,  Patron Saint of the Repressed.  Later on I might have to walk around this filthy town, trying to figure out my kinks.  Booze is taking hold.  Delayed reaction.  How strange.  Let’s not bury the lede here.  good intelligence again.  A week of good to great intelligence as the season of freedom ends.  Thus commences the summer of living dangerously.  Red heart.  Red heart.  Need to rewatch that Italian movie but that summer truly starts.  Is there still time?  for me it’s always too late.  Handshake felt wonderful.  YOU CLIMB THE MOUNTAIN!!!  THE RULERS OF THE WASTELAND!!!  I can’t get anything done.  Just want to smell her ass.  My degenerative ways.  No, The Symbol of Purity has me but I am too dirty and awful to meet her gaze.  Every moment needs to be recorded. No, they’re already all fading.  Because I’m so deeply flawed.  They’ll all be lost.  Evil.  All that worry evaporated in an instant.  Chinchilla.  Can’t get anything done . happy to see him.  Anywhere you want.  Sat at the usual table with the godawful uncomfortable seats.  Explained the differences.  Then with a band accompaniment explained the lack of necessity to make it to the dawn.  So willing to share.  So lovely.  Need to avoid the gaze.  So wonderful.  Just kept paying for additional sin.  At one point seemed the sin would be at an end.  Time to call it a day and all that.  but when questioned, paused, impossible to resist, couldn’t speak, and then the smile and raised brow was just too goddamn much, would have exploded right then and there if I wasn’t your old pal Johnny Impotency.  So instead the synapses instead the greasy inner corridors of my mind starting shooting off everywhere.  Oh, to just be trapped in that moment forever with the loveliest smile and the arched brow.  And the giggle somewhere.  All too much.  All too glorious.  More options laid out.  All sounded so honeyed.  Of course, I went for the cheapest.  I’m a dirt cheap kind of guy.  A real skinflint.  Real tight with a dollar.  Can’t entirely say that given the hundreds I’ve gone through already in honor of The Symbol of Purity.  Collar up.  Ink.  Couple different meanings of course.  Bare witness.  And then it was all done and more information gleaned, more crucial intelligence.  Every other one.  YOU CLIMB THE MOUNTAIN!!!  FACE TO FACE!!!  How perfect, to stumble upon that phrase right now.  masquerade.  Visionary alliance.  I wouldn’t know what to do in that moment.  I’m desperate.  I’m awful.  Awful.  Times given, all so fast, clocking the trajectory of the mountain.  Lovely to hear.  Understanding more and more.  Parting is such sweet sorrow.  How many hours (or days?!) until I may be alive again.  Beautiful.  Just gotta get through this phase.  The way out is through!  The killer is me! and the derriere.  So wonderful.  So hypnotic.  Just want to be shrunken down to grasshopper size and crushed beneath her beauty.  Then plopped in her mouth like a treat, crushed between her teeth, scraped off the roof of her mouth with her tongue as though I were peanut butter.  No, he just wants a hug.  With a hug he would melt and die, the sweetest death, want to come quick then die (tell the truth).  How he would love to hear her say his name again.  To make her laugh again.  Already jealous when others have that privilege.  Oh yeah he has it deep.  He’s so wrong, so degenerate.  Filthy awful thing.  He would kiss and worship her feet.  Yellow.  Don’t forget the yellow.  The same term again, the same term.  What does it all mean in the grander scheme of things?!  dear.  Like honey.  It’s a good thing a big full time distraction is right around the corner.  That will help balance things out.  Or will it?!  the more I learn the less I want to know.  The derriere!!!  I can’t get anything done.  Maybe soon again.  Maybe less than twenty four hours.  Maybe forty eight.  But soon.  oh, the joys of waiting and anticipation.  Oh the sweet suffering.  Need to read something by Clive Barker soon .  oh The Symbol of Purity, you are everything in this moment.  You have consumed me.  He’s falling into a spiral, in back of the spiral is a massive image of her face, smile, brow, lovely. 

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