What an unbelievably dumb motherfucker I am! I wrote
all that crap the other day and forgot to mention just how much I fucking love
Gloria Trevi’s new song and video! Can’t
wait to see what comes next! What a
worthless phrase – can’t wait to see….
It’s not like that isn’t over done.
That’s why I’ll never be a great or successful writer, because I’m a
shitty one bereft of ideas! But yeah,
that little tempo reeancmetn of the act of sexual intercourse…that’s a touch I
really like. Vampire queen. I need this in my miserable and utterly
worthless life right now. Hopefully I
can see you again. This time I won’t
hesitate to…oh come on, the past me knows what I’m talking about. I won’t hesitate this time. i would definitely pick The High End of Low
as Marilyn Manson’s weakest (and it’s predecessor Eat Me, Drink Me as second
weakest) but there are still a few gems therein. I love that album Earthling. I listen to it all the time (when I’m not
eating blueberries). I drove around last
evening listening to Car Wheels on a Gravel Road album and things momentarily
felt okay. Maybe even better than
okay. So much to do. Is this actually the beginning of
something? I don’t know anything. So much pain. Whenever mad season reoccurs I always think of
Diana and her preferences in the record store.
Must dig out the old rucka and enjoy and rejoice.
I don’t think I’m capable of hurting you. That wasn’t me who said that. Do not, cannot accept compensation. Perhaps a small drink of pure alcohol. Oh, what that not be the height of
loveliness? There is a strong need and
desire to capture every single moment, everything that has happened. There was a walk around the perimeter. It replete with exercise equipment and
sleeping vagabonds. There is such a
great fear of these moments disappearing into the universe. Moments so very very few know about. They can hardly be said to have happened at
all. That walk around the perimeter was
in fact only a repetition of a previous walk for which one of the active
participants could not be in attendance.
That previous walk was one through the dark and culminating with staring
up at the stars. These are the
signatures. The braille and swimming with
mermaids. The previous written words
which now hold even more true. The noose
and it’s circular nature. And all the
explosions everywhere (kaboom). Doubled. That was the right thing to do, can’t really
trust anyone these days. It was the
unrequited taste of raspberries again. Safety inside the storm. Traveling along that same road and he hears
echoes from all the places you’ve been. And
that is what he wants. Inviting a
friend. someone more feminine. She was thinking of you too. The signals were all out. There was earlier. Waiting on the benches. And the color that would not fade. Permission asked. Seeing the gangsters farther away and
relating the tales of all those dreams which could never come to fruition. And odd things. but you
knew, you both knew. Before the
one who passes judgement and now it all starts.
And these moments are lovely. What
happened? You are nervous. There is a summation taking place. In the beginning there was the furtiveness
and the glances backward, unsure. And then
again and nothing was recognizable and there was white purity down below. And there was a walk of thanks and the fruit
and the chocolate and the walk of relief afterward followed by running and
freeform. Delays followed and things seemed
simple then. The break in time was
valued and necessary and then so soon after different types of breaks things
were renewed and strong and an embrace destroyed everything and created
something new and wonderful. And then it
repeated and there was no second break which only proved the validity. Inherent.
He wanted to run with…. Couldn’t
leave without…. Can I pay you back with…? Please, don’t forget anything. This will live on for as long as we…. I don’t think I could ever do anything to
hurt you. I didn’t say that. Wanted to say nice to meet you but we already
know each other. Sweet laughter. During the telephone lines too. What’s a telephone bill? Then further on…the signals up, everyone on
the same wavelength. This will all be
okay in time. slavery inside
domesticity. You are okay for now. Missing you is the ultimate betrayal. there are so many things which will never be
complete. There are so many things which
will never be explored. There are so
many emotions which will never be felt. Hate
to crib. All these pieces that we’ll
never be able to put together. Somewhere
out there is a version of them dancing, perhaps at a costume ball. There are tears, as always. Is that so wrong? Please do not think of me anymore. What were you thinking in that moment? What don’t you care about? Is that the right way to phrase it? Is it wrong to venture? You ask again what you were thinking about in
that moment? What happened? I’ll come back for you. What philosophies are we going with. What is that nature of what is taking place
right now right then? Times to consider
that old adage of living as though it were your last moment. But immediately after she wondered if that
could ever be proper. Was that final
assessment about the character wrong? Most
likely. Maybe good to do something nice
every once in a while. That walk, if
only things could have been slowed down.
every single moment now exists for always. Right there on the corner, everything exchanged
and intimate and respectful. Did my soul
good to know…. Now you understand. No distance between
them. And all was so sweet and lovely
and he wished it would never end. You paint
the sky in beautiful colors.
I am deeply excited for the release of the Criterion
edition of The Tree of Life. man i really do love that Gloria Trevi song! Hope there's a new album right over the horizon!
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