Sunday, April 27, 2025

floral paper paid less for less amphibian puppet felt nothing out the patriotic place first sign of disaster ignored then wine then too late

 

Reminiscing over the massive palm springs ass.  It was truly a glorious sight.  Black leggings.  Black hair . I have a check for five dollars American.  Slime at one point.  Sexy slime.  Replacing venetian blinds.  I wasn’t exactly dressed for disco dancing!  I am writing these words under considerable duress.  Or am i?! the more I learn the less I want to know.  So difficult to find amalbert content.  Not difficult, no.  but I need more.  How did all this begin?  How did I slip into this?  Recollections of the….  Yes, stream makes the most sense.  Dumb ugly white trash lady down below me hacking up a lung.  What is it with the white trash that live so near me that they have such trouble breathing and love to show that off to all the neighbors?  Fucking idiots.  Blondie star and venus has me.  but that’s just the day’s culmination.  Not even the full culmination just the day. shut the fuck up already, I said.  dumb ugly white trash.  Shame white trash loves to have so many kids.  They’re always ugly kids too.  What’s up with that?  anyway, the wagon trailed way way up.  Me thinks he was feeling a tad bit stressed and began looking for relief in all the wrong places (should have went for icy hot! Apropos of nothing).  And so commerce came to the rescue.  Goods and/or services of real value exchanged for currency plain.  The essence of commerce!  So hard to find these days what with all the crackdowns.  Wonder how it will be in the future [where we all have flying cars!  And when we’re busy populating other planets (rolls eyes)]  plastic transactions.  Fast forward to him sitting in his car in a busy parking lot after having just walked around a large conglomerate twice for various no good reasons (though one involving ‘za).  Recollections of the….  Difficult to have nostalgia for such a destructive force but there it is.  Mouth hungry.  Remember a light blue.  Remembering washing dishes.  Not finished washing dishes.  A red shirt at a very patriotic place.  Everything before so comparatively innocent.  The moments back and forth on the blue.  Completely undoing everything that had come before.  Summarized in a humble collection (truly underground).  Remember falling down that hill? Remember dancing with that nun?  In the center of the ring just like a….  no cause yet for such mileage (except the main cause) but likely very soon.  Homemade Christmas dessert.  The lack of experience was brutal.  But I am in their corners for life.  Or am I?  the more I learn the less I want to know.  Yes, I am!  Star has me.  should I make myself comfortable?  A burgundy I think.  Very close up.  And everything ceasing it’s functionality right on schedule.  Way back with the rhapsody in blue.  The creepiness of it all.  Way too complimentary.  Nicest or most caring, something to that effect.  Doesn’t add up.  Coal black.  Of course, the friend.  the friend who has a dual meaning in all of this sloppy slippery mess.  The witness.  Betrayal on top of betrayal.  once purchased a hot dog late at night at a gas station.  Then the ice princess (think carefully).  So cruel and hateful and bountiful.  Long time no see.  Through he remembered that he needed to do a load of laundry.  The same one he’s done half a dozen times in the past couple weeks as his selection of outfits continues to dwindle.  Needed for the morning tasks.  Which include a necessary removal.  And  so another unexpected image to help grow the feverish state.  Face card strong.  Right on the chin.  Never exactly the same from the old days of two.  For there was another sink there.  a different sink than the one mentioned earlier.  A generous act.  A position of generosity.  Looking right at the corner of the room all the while.  Recently drank some orange and had some chicken wings.  Generous selection at the establishment.  Heightening the feverish recollections of the….  The other night. Single braid was everything.  Nights before that, blurred black dress.  Yes, so unexpected this.  But very intuitive.  Night before at some dive.  Soft in the middle and red on top.  Need a new dive.  I’ve oversaturated myself at my current one.  oh no, digging through old recollections in search of the missing means and modes of the glorious palm springs ass.  Remembering a lovely goodbye.  Ah all the thoughts of the full generous culturally appropriate meals and the giggles. After effects and punishment.   Of course, can’t be entirely complete without remembrances of the chain of command.  Forest green t-shirt that shouldn’t but did.  something laid to rest to atop a yellow plastic bin.  Borrowed then returned then borrowed again.  Black with white stripes.  Beige with black stripes.  So different approach. Ultimately oddly uncoordinated. Tiny tiny. What did it all mean?  We lost our souls some where.  Dropped them on the road before falling off the wagon .  need to drink more juice.  And now the collage growing.  Everything more real when not truly experienced.  One of my ultimate fantasies involved being knocked out with an industrial haptic feedback robotic arm and thus made to look foolish.  In many of my fantasies I have a stupid look on my face.  thinking about electricity a lot . and humiliating failure.  Many of my fantasies involve humiliating failure on my part.  Which is to say that all of this is so controlling yet amounts to almost absolutely nothing at all.  Going back and forth from the dead serious to the smiling.  Imagining the moment of truth while going back and forth like that.  would it have been better to never have had the experience.  Very often, I think so.  But can’t really do a damn thing about it now.  Or can I?!  the more I learn the less I want to know.  Avoid apologizing if it’s only to make your conscience feel better.  I can see the unraveling.  And then by the fire kissing leather.  Before that a fake holiday with a 24 hour pass.  A year or more of ugliness masquerading as joy.  All brought about by yours falsely.  Maybe I’ll eat frosted flakes in the morning. 

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